Discovered this blog.

I'm starting to think that I should give up on this. I'm not sure if it's worth the blood, sweat, and tears anymore. I kind of don't want to waste anymore time. I don't want to keep trying and just find myself going nowhere.

I'm in that mood again where I just want to close myself off from the world. I dont feel like seeing anyone or interacting with others. I just kind of want to stay in my room all day. I'm trying to cheer up though. It's not good to feel that way. I'm going to Del Mar tomorrow with all my cousins so that should be really fun. I really neeeeed to be happy though!! I don't know what will make me happy. I'm not sure what to do. I'm starting to forget what my goal in life is. I dont think I know what I want anymore. It changes all the time and I'm just never sure anymore. Lately, I feel like I've just been forcing myself to do everything. I'm trying to do what's uncomfortable until it's comfortable. I guess I'm improvig slowly though. I was cleaning all morning today. Like the hardcore cleaning dude. I'm not even done cleaning my room. I should finish that tomorrow then.

I need to continue back to my work. I shouldn't be blogging right now haha. I just had a lot on my mind. Lately I've been feeling like I can't say everything anymore. People see it the wrong way or mix my words around. Idk. It just doesn't go well but I don't like keeping things to myself and I feel like I have to say it you know? Anyway, it is time to go back to work.