Disaster dinner

I thought today was going to be a good day. It really wasn't. I really need to stop keeping my hopes so high. I really thought everything was going to go according as planned. I really thought it did. I saw it all in my head too how everything was going to happen.

I had dinner with my mom and brother at Red Lobster. I thought it was going to be a good night but of course it didn't. I always get upset towards the end of the time I'm spending with my mom. She just always has to start complaining and yell at me. She always gets mad. She always ignores me and never listens. I tell her my dreams and what I want to do. I tell her all the thing I was planning to do to help all of us.

Like I said earlier, I don't want to help people who don't want to be helped. Honestly, she needs to trust me. It's not just her. People have a hard time trusting me. I don't understand. I'm a pretty honest person and I have never done anyone wrong. I think people should be able to trust me.

I kind of feel like giving up. I'm so tired. Rev3 keeps me up but it can't keep me mentally awake. My body can be up and running but on the inside I am just so exhausted. I'm so surprised that I'm still working hard like there's no tomorrow. I guess I kind of let things go this week. I slept in most days because I was tired. I even accidentally left my right piercing out and now it's closed. So yeah I have to get it repierced in a few weeks. I hate dealing with the healing process.